I have come to realize that it is no wonder that I cannot get into shape. I have replaced any physical activity in my life with a laptop or my Kindle. I sit on my computer and harvest enough crops to open my own farmer’s market. I crush enough candy that I shouldn’t even want to look at a Dove Chocolate bar when I go in the store. And I simulate exercising my brain by challenging as many people as I can in Words with Friends. I do all this while I “WATCH” the Biggest Loser and sit there thinking I wish I could do that.
I took the initiative a couple months ago to venture into the world of Zumba and somehow made my way from there back home to my comfortable couch with the recliner on the end and spiffy little armrest with a nice little cup holder that is utilized too much for a diet coke, an unsweetened tea and not a ice cold bottle of water.
I don’t know why it is so hard to find the willpower to whip myself back into shape. Now granted I don’t expect to have the body of a Victoria Secret model or even make people gasp at my sexiness like what happens when Jennifer Aniston walks into a room. I would however like to be able to put on a pair of jeans that is about 6 sizes smaller than what I wear now.
I’ve tried everything from putting pictures inside the cabinet door where I stash the Little Debbie’s of my much skinnier body in a swimsuit, to writing “DO NOT EAT THIS” notes on things. I’ve attempted giving up on chocolate or anything that remotely resembles the calorie count it has. I’ve tried diet pills, diet drinks, diet programs and diet meals. And to be honest it does get rather frustrating and depressing.
You would think that it would be motivation enough when I have the Rescue Squad on speed dial just in case there is a need for the jaws of life when I get trapped in the panty hose that are illegally two sizes too small simply for the purpose of trying to make me appear smaller from the waist down than I actually am. Or the fact that putting on anything that comes from the world of Spandex makes my hind end look likes two pigs wrestling in a burlap sack! Add in the fact that when I look down and see my shoe untied I would rather offer to pay a stranger in Wal-Mart money to tie it for me rather than risk the embarrassment of passing out when I attempt to bend down and tie it myself. All of these reasons should inspire me enough to put the electronic devices down and get out the exercise DVD’s and Wii games that Jess got me trying to help encourage me to do something to feel better.
I suppose that just like everything else I will do it when the time is right and I know I’m doing it for me and not just for other people that worry about me or that I want to look better for.
But when you become complacent with walking past Victoria Secrets and going to Lane Bryant to look for night wear then you get further and further away from doing what you need to do. I KNOW I would feel better not only physically but mentally too if I had a body that when I looked in the mirror that I fantasized more about having an infomercial wearing a sports bra with rock hard abs than fearing that if Jenny Craig saw me they would look at me as a challenge.
I’m not sure what it’s going to take to get me in the right frame of mind that I need to be in to get on the road to looking better and feeling better but I do know that it is going to have to start with putting the electronic devices down and start actually going outside instead or else I’m going to have to find an app online that simulates the beach because that’s the only beach I’m going to feel comfortable wearing a bikini at!
So if there is anyone who reads these little burst of thoughts that I have on here has some motivation to offer me please feel free to encourage me at any time.
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