After my child bearing years were over it seemed like I lost all confidence in how I looked. My body felt like it had been run through a ringer with my last child and I felt like that's exactly what I looked like. Then after I turned 40 it seemed like losing weight has been an uphill battle. I found it much easy to jokingly put myself down than to ever find anything positive about me to say.
When you are no longer have the body that you had when you were 20 (something) you start to feel a little less of a woman. But this week a friend of mine pointed out in no uncertain terms that a woman is not measured by her weight or how she fits into her jeans; because beauty is not measured in the numbers 36-26-36.
When I was in my younger days I dressed to the hilt and in a manner that I was screaming for a compliment. But as I have gotten older I'm more conservative in how I dress and a lot more modest about my body. When I have received a compliment in the past I didn't really it serious - I took it more in the context of someone just trying to make me feel better. It's not really a pity party that I have; but more so a reality check that I am not in my 20's anymore and I shouldn't expect to look like I am.
My family has been blessed with great genetics. My Mom looks 20 years younger than what she is and I have cousins that I swear stopped the aging process at 30. So I am spending a lot of time doing some wishful thinking that the gene has been passed on to me and that by the time I am 50 that I won't look like the running gears of destruction.
Regardless though of how we fit into our clothes, how many times we cover up the gray or how many new signs of age that we develop - the beauty that we have should project from the inside of us. Now I am more guilty than most women of standing in front of the mirror praying for a miracle in the form of Oil of Olay. Sometimes that miracle comes and sometimes it doesn't - but regardless of how gracefully we try to age - it's going to happen and we just have to make the best of it.
After I stopped having the body that I had when I was in my 20's and part of my 30's my dad would remind me each time I took a cookie that I didn't need that if I wasn't careful my hind end would end up 3 axe handles and a butcher knife wide. I didn't listen to him and so it came to pass. The only thing that is good about that though is that apparently in the eyes of most of the younger generation I tend to have the right equipment for something referred to as twerking. But by all definitions of that I'm quite certain that activity would require a hip replacement in the near future.
I have brought myself down to earth and realized that I will never be 20 again. I may never have the physique of Jennifer Aniston BUT I don't have to settle for achieving the goal of having the physique of Rosanne Barr. I can still be beautiful in my own way - just like every woman can. We should never put ourselves in the mindset that in order to be considered gorgeous that we have wear a size 2 jean. Sometimes
a woman in a size 12 can be just as appealing.
The other day I got brave enough to post a picture of myself on Facebook because I had gotten a new haircut. If you know me then you know I'm not one to pose in the bathroom mirror and take pictures every day. Several people commented and everyone had something to say complimenting the new look. I felt like I was on cloud 9 with all these sweet things that were said. The difference in that and someone trying to pay me a compliment before that? This time I chose to accept the compliments and it felt pretty darn good.
As women we are expected to look good. To fix our hair, put on our make-up, wear high heels and doll up in prissy outfits. I don't think we always have to go that extreme - heck there are days I go to Wal-Mart without make-up. But we should always put forth an effort.
Putting forth that effort is just part of the battle though. You have to accept the fact that you have your own beauty. In doing that it means that when someone compliments you then accept the compliment and simply smile and say thank you. That's what I did this week and I have to be honest it felt pretty good!
