So apparently last night there was a ballgame going on that
involved a halftime show. Immediately after the halftime show the social media
blew up with people voicing their thoughts and opinions about the
entertainment. If 5 decades have taught me anything it is that
I have the option of thinking things through before I speak about it, so I
decided to sleep on it and put my thoughts into perspective.
I first would like to say that this is strictly my opinion.
I highly doubt that the NFL will base their decision on halftime shows in the
near future based on what I have to say. I would also like to say that I
personally pretty much in awe that JLo and Shakira can actually do the things
that they did during their performances. In awe because if I attempted
something like that I would be scheduling the first available appointment with
my orthopedic doctor for yet another type of replacement – more than likely my
hips. I am 53 years old and to be honest I struggle with being able to throw my
leg up on the coffee table to zip my boots. They are both incredibly gorgeous,
talented women with bodies that make some 20 year old women green with envy.
They had more dance moves than a whole stage or Rockettes and Back Street Boys.
JLo has always seemed pretty classy to me. She dresses like
a Vogue magazine cover and always looks beautiful no matter where she is. Even
walking her dog with sweats and her hair in a messy bun she still makes the
hearts of men flutter everywhere. My question is… with all that going for her,
why was it necessary to incorporate half of an outfit and a pole in the middle
of the stage to dance on?
Strong willed daughters like my youngest feel that she was
merely expressing herself and that women should have the right to do that.
Perhaps there is some truth in that, but was it really necessary? Did her
provocative dancing in a barely clad costume while grabbing her crotch make her
performance of her songs sound any better? Sure, she put on a show and danced
off 3,525 calories…but at what cost? I mean to women like me and millions of
others who struggle to find an outfit to look “nice” in, well it was
disheartening that she felt like that was something that was necessary to do to
look good.
The way that she dresses, the way that she looks and the way
that she maintains her figure are the things that are powerful tools at her
fingertips to use to encourage women to take care of themselves and to strive
to look like. Would I love to be able to wear anything in black leather that
wouldn’t require a jar of Vaseline to put on and the Jaws of Life to take
off? Of course, but regardless of
whether I could – it doesn’t mean that I should.
I don’t feel that the opinions of women who were
disappointed in her choices last night should be condemned as jealousy or
judgment. I do believe that those are opinions that either come from women who
are modest, old fashioned or [dare I say without offending someone] Christian
women who simply feel that seeing another woman who is a role model for so many
and a mother of a daughter herself was in fact just simply that….a
disappointment.
There were comments that this effected equality because it
took women to a level of feeling like they needed to do something like dance
from a pole to make someone look at them and think that they are sexy. Women
and men commented things like “how can women expect be respected the same as a
man when they act that way?” Do I think
that is a bit harsh? Or perhaps do I think maybe to the extreme? Yes, probably
so. Why? Because I don’t think you can base the fact that I am not respected
any longer in the workplace because Jennifer Lopez set a less than favorable
example for women during a football game that millions were watching.
What category do I fall in? Am I modest? Christian? Old
fashioned? Well, I am a little of all of
those combined. Am I jealous that she could hang upside down with a bodysuit on
that absolutely had to have duct tape involved at some level? Absolutely not.
Even if I could get away with doing that…well I wouldn’t. When I think of an
idealistic woman I think of a woman who dresses with class and dignity whether
it be in a dress and 4 inch heels or in a pair of jeans with a hoodie; I think
of a woman who makes the conscious choice to glorify the beauty of all women by
setting an example to follow.
Am I judging her for her costume choice? Well, judging is a
strong word. I do think that if she wants to wear something that stands a good
chance of a wardrobe slip up like Janet Jackson’s boob slip, perhaps it shouldn’t
be on a stage with millions of people watching. I just think that modesty is a
sexier attribute than putting on a costume that took less material than my 3
year old granddaughter’s sun dress I bought her. Am I condemning her choice of dance
moves? Perhaps I just think that her
ability to dance like she does period was enough to impress people.
What it all comes down to is that it’s not that I have the
opinion that she should be banned from the female race. I do think though that
with anything that can spark a debate like her performance did, that it is a
prime example of just because you can do something, well it doesn’t mean you
should. As women we have struggled for years to earn the mutual respect that
men receive. We want to be respected by others and we want people to believe
that there isn’t much that a man can do that a woman can’t. What makes us stand
out though is that we have an opportunity daily to set examples for other
women, daughters, nieces and granddaughters. We have the amazing ability to
lift each other up in so many ways. When I see women in different environments
than me, whether it be the red carpet of Hollywood or a banquet in my hometown
to honor a woman for her achievements – I try to find something about them to
inspire me to be the type of woman that aspires other women when they look at
me. Those are the things that we can do
and should.
